I'm not sure whether I'd like to curl up into a ball and take a nap, or if I should just sit here and meditate as I write. I remember last time I got my dog, I was really nervous, but this time I'm past the point of nervous and almost to the point of being sick. I keep telling myself that I'll be ok, that I'll accpt this dog fully and unconditionally, but then I think of Fiona and that's what makes things hard. That, and they're bringing dogs down in about six minutes. I requested to be last to get my dog, not because I want to delay and make my wait more painful and hard, but because I think I just need a bit of time. I've got my door open, and I'm just waiting, remembering, and most importantly, getting ready for this new dog. It's not an enviable position to be in, but I hear that it's normal to be stressed out, and it could get worse as we actually train. At least this afternoon will be a time that I can get to know my dog. I know that there's no myth to the fact that dogs calm us all, and I'm hoping that my whole apprehensive attitude will change in the next few minutes. There's a guy whose in my group who is getting his fifth dog this time, and he tells me that "it'll be all right". I sincerely hope that is the case.
For the minute now, this place is heavy with anticipation and excitement. Some people are standing out in the hallway waiting, while others have holed up in their rooms. I'll be holed up.
And as I hear the first dog bark, I'll close. It's time!